Can I just say "I'm sorry" about sin?

What happens when we come face to face with our sin?

Do we shrink away? Do we turn away? Do we hide?
Do we offer excuses? Do we place blame? Do we justify ourselves?
Do we bargain? Do we really commit this time to try harder?
Do we tend to our own wounds, touch up our exposed selves, re-frame our broken pieces?
Do we just say we’re sorry?

Can we just say we’re sorry and have it be ok?

When confronted with our sin, God’s heart is for us to confess and repent. Is that the same as saying “I’m sorry”?

If you journey with me, you know we've been tracking with David’s story in 2 Samuel 11-12. When his sin and heart were exposed...

“David said to Nathan, ‘I have sinned against the LORD.’ Nathan replied, ‘The LORD has taken away your sin.’” (2 Samuel 12:13)

Was it merely words? Did he just say he was sorry, and that's it? Presto change-o, everything was ok?

Read 1 John 1:8-10.

What does this say about confessing sin? What does it say if we deny that we have sin?

Confessing is coming to God and declaring openly to God what you have done, not denying anything but instead agreeing with Him fully, that what you've done, said, or thought was against Him and His ways.

So are these verses about being saved or confessing our sins on a Tuesday? Yes.

If you have not trusted Christ as your Savior, this is the Good News! Tell God about your sin and be washed clean!

If you have trusted Christ as your Savior, consider the words of Jennifer Kennedy Dean. “Jesus knew [forgiveness] would be finished at the Cross…It is the confessing and turning from a sin that brings the Father’s forgiveness into your experience.”  (Set Apart)

Kevin DeYoung explains confession this way: “The cleansing [when we confess], mind you, is not like the expunging of a guilty record before the judge. That’s already been accomplished. This cleansing is more like the scraping of barnacles off the hull of a ship so it can move freely again. We need confession of sin before God like a child needs to own up to her mistakes before Mom and Dad, not to earn God’s love, but to rest in it and know it more fully…1 John 1:9, then, is not just about getting saved. It’s also about living as a saved person and enjoying it.”

Confession.

So what actually took place when David said “I have sinned against the LORD”?

Look closer at two truths with me.

David had a change in his heart.
David’s confession was not just “I've sinned,” or, “I am sorry I got caught.” The words “against the LORD” are key. David realized that all his sin, everything that he had done as his heart was led astray, all of it, was against God. Those words reveal that his heart that was once led astray and calloused was now broken. At that moment he was turning back to God, His ways, and their relationship.

David had a change in his god.
Pastor and leader Jeff Vanderstelt has a profound definition for repentance.

Repentance isn't a change of behavior.
Repentance is a change of our god which will lead to a change of behavior.

David didn't say, “I'm sorry, I won't do that anymore. I am going to do all these things better and different.” Or, “Well I can't fix this, but I did try to make this right.” David didn't change his behavior first. He changed his god.

Who had his god been? Who had he followed and worshiped? Who had he lived for?
Himself, his wants, his needs, his desires, his ability to cover up, his comfort. Himself.

Repentance meant that David would turn away from the god of himself and his desires and turn towards the LORD.

David confessed his sin. The LORD was faithful and just to forgive David of his sins and cleanse him from all unrighteousness. David’s story after this moment was a journey with God beyond this sin, and living in fellowship (deep, active, connected relationship) with God.

When cracks in our hard exteriors are pierced in a moment by light, and what we've done is exposed?
When truth finally penetrates what feels like a layer of tar that seems to coat our hearts and souls, causing feeling in a place once anesthetized?

I’m sorry...?

If those words usher you into God's heart for you to fully

Confess. Repent.

then surely, humbly, use them.

Just another seed of my faith,
Ginny

Where God is when I sin

When I was in school, along with "Hypercolor" t-shirts there was a trend with posters, where hidden in the picture made of minute shapes was a 3-D image. The bright pink and blue contrasts looked like “snow” on a TV with an interrupted signal, but the cool kids would exclaim with astonishment when they saw the image, and the really cool kids could pick it out quickly.

I could never see those stupid 3-D images. All I ever saw was pink and blue snow. So I faked it. I’d agree with the group of kids, and even roll my eyes in slight annoyance at other kids who couldn't see what clearly everyone else could see. 

I had no idea what I was looking at. 

I think sometimes our picture of God feels like a 3-D illusion poster. Somehow people around us seem to see something about Him, and at times we’ll even fake it, but fact is, we've never seen God that way. 

This was a place of vulnerability for me when it came to where God was and how God saw me when I sinned, repeatedly chose sin, or when I was a mess, laying in a heap at the end of the path of heart led astray. 

What have you heard about where He is and how He feels when we've sinned or we've gotten stuck at the bottom of a pit? 

Maybe it’s radical, wide grace and love, and you've just never seen Him that way.
Maybe it’s discipline (but that seems like a Christian word for punishment and total disapproval).
Maybe it’s strong words that scare you, because they hint at a picture that God will at some point just be done with repeat offenders.
Maybe you've never heard and so you've created your own picture. 

When we aren't sure where God is or how He feels when we have sinned, our picture is snow. 

But, come see. See for yourself. 

David, in the midst of sin--having lusted, had sex with another man’s wife, lied, manipulated, lived in total hypocrisy, murdered, created a home at the end of the path of heart led astray, with a totally calloused heart--thought he had it all covered. He had settled in to a life built around sin. It seems in this part of his story (2 Sam. 11) God is nowhere to be found. The chapter closes with a clue for us.

“But the thing David did displeased the LORD.” (2 Sam. 11:27)

Examine those words. What does that verse say about God, where He is, and how He feels about David?

Careful now. Really look.

God was there seeing David’s life, choices, and heart. God knew David’s sin and it displeased our holy God. 
     God had not left or ignored David.
          God also knew David, and who he really was. And He loved him.

Where do we see that? 

In 2 Samuel 12, God didn't sit feeling displeased, He didn't withdraw from David, He moved towards David.

Rich in mercy, abounding in love, He didn't ignore sin or send immediate judgment or punishment; He sent an opportunity to repent. This is the nature of the LORD.

And so, He sent His “mouthpiece,” Nathan. Nathan came to David at rock bottom, at the end of heart led astray, and boldly spoke truth to him, exposing David’s heart and sin. God’s heart was for David to confess and repent.

(How has God spoken truth into your life, shedding light on your sin, and pointing you to a relationship with Him? What were those words and how did you react to His message? Did you see this as God moving towards you to reach you?)

We see this truth played out in the Gospel. When we were at our worst, total enemies of God, a heap of mess far from God, repeat offenders--God moved towards us. He sent His only Son, Who put on flesh and made His home among us. This time, He didn't send a prophet, He came full of grace and truth, to show us Who He is, who we are, and how He feels about us. Sin displeases Him because He is holy, and He loves us. He showed His love by giving His perfect life in our place on the cruel cross, taking on our sin. He conquered our sin with His own death. God brought Him back to life, showing off His glory, and giving us a picture of what He will do with every sinner who trusts Christ as their Rescuer—give them new life! The Good News is because of Jesus Christ, God gives us an opportunity to turn to Him and follow Him. 

Want to see clearly where God is and how He feels when we sin? Throughout His whole Story, including David’s story, we see again and again--when we sin God is near, seeing everything, knowing who we are, and loving us. He moves towards us, desiring that we confess our sin and turn to Him. 

Confess. Repent. (That's what we'll explore next!)

Just another seed of my faith,
Ginny