I have so wanted to blog. My writing energy has gone towards work, and it has been good and right! But I have a list of about 9 blog entries that I have wanted to share for some time now. And I have just enough margin on a Friday afternoon to share this one.
I share in a women's Bible study on Tuesday nights. This semester it was a toss up between Romans and Judges. God led us to Judges. I found a small set of verses on the journey in Judges that opened my eyes to the beauty of offering myself to the work of God.
"...when the people willingly offer themselves--praise the LORD!...My heart is with Israel's princes, with the willing volunteers among the people. Praise the LORD." (Judges 5:2,9)
I recall reading this with a heart seeking God over what exactly He was doing with a woman like Deborah. I am a woman in leadership. And there are times where it is not easy. In fact, the more leadership God has called me to, the harder it is. (That's another blog on the list.) There are times where it feels like a man might be more heard, respected, or followed than a woman like me. I am not at all complaining about where God has put me. I was told by a new and yet deep friend that I am never to apologize for my anointing. Deborah didn't apologize for her anointing. She willingly did exactly what God asked her to. God was doing something significant for His people and His glory through her. When she and Barak sing together over victory in chapter 5, their song resonated with my heart.
I often long for people to willingly offer themselves to His work. I want them to be passionate about what God is doing and leave behind the worldly stuff that consumes us and follow Christ in things more important and eternal. That's about all I'll say about that potential soapbox, because God was quick to remind me that He has called and anointed me to willingly offer myself. He'll deal with others offering themselves. And frankly I may not see half of what God calls others to willingly offer themselves to. He is very good about asking us to do things with no recognition. Assessing the fullness of someone else's willingness or calling is not for me. God gently applied the gospel to me and required that I see His word as a mirror (James 1:22-24) and see what it looks like when I willing offer myself.
When I willingly offer myself to the work God has for me, praise to God happens! It's almost as though there is relief in that phrase. It's as if all along God desired for me to be a living sacrifice (Romans 12:1), or willingly offer myself, and when I decide to actually do it, the immediate fruit of it is praise. Not stress or one more thing on my plate or begrudging movement, but praise. It's as if the fog of personal perception clears and a fresh wind of purpose fulfilled (Psalm 57:2) blows through my life. I can see clearly exactly what God wants me to do (Romans 12:2), and it's good, perfect, and pleasing! What a relief! I can move in freedom into what He wants me to do and offer Him praise. Praise that I was called into something good, pleasing, and perfect! What else does any woman desire out of her calling but for it to be good, pleasing, and perfect? You'd have to get excited about whoever brought that about--and it's God! So there's praise!
Praise is so much lighter than obligation.
When I willingly offer myself, unity with others happens. I have prayed and longed for that in several places in my life. I have served with others where there is unity and it is so life-giving! I have also seen the carnage disunity will inevitably bring. If you look at these verses, it's not just me that offers myself to a work of God or a calling, but others as well. Now I can look at others. Not the ones I think should be willingly offering themselves to this work, but the ones that have. "When the people.." That means whoever comprises "us" in this work. God has called each of us to join together and we can be unified. I have to admit, I love serving with other people. My sweetest days in ministry have been doing ministry life with other people. God intended us to be a people for His glory. That means "us." And unity brings about His glory!
Unity also does something to our hearts. As a woman, it fills my heart to overflowing when we are unified and together in our calling. If you'll allow me...I have sat at the head of a table, like Deborah, and seen a group of 14 people working towards the same mission and vision. Not just in the fun times or the "good results" times, but in the moments of tough words, laying our ideas, failures, and creativity shamelessly on the table, I have had a full heart. I have felt so deeply connected and fulfilled because of one word: our. I have stood like Deborah in a room full of leaders and expressed vision and a fresh, wild initiative and I have had to be unapologetic for God's anointing and yet humble because they were precious leaders valued and called by the same God. I have taken a risk in all that, and when lights went on and people willingly offered themselves to the vision and way we were called to, I had a full heart. I have sat like Deborah, under a tree, and listened to friends with a big vision and a pure heart struggle with vision and heart. And when we had sought wisdom and love and desired God in all that vision, I had a full heart. I was with people, princes and volunteers, and it has brought such deep satisfaction to my heart that it was "us" and I was called to be included in movement and heart to be together with those people for His glory.
The beauty of a leader like Deborah is that she stepped forward into her calling, and willingly offered herself to a work of God. The beauty of God's way is that others joined her. She was so about God, us, and our, that she even shared the song as a duet, and you can't tell which part was hers. The glory of God was that in the end it brought an entire nation back to Him. That's what willingly offering myself can do. A people wrapped back into a relationship with a loving, holy God...that sounds good, pleasing and perfect, doesn't it?
Just a seed of my faith,
Ginny
Friday, November 18, 2011
Saturday, September 10, 2011
To Worship, Just Breathe
Have you ever just wanted to say something great to God? You are there with Him, you've emptied your list and your heart, and all of the real you is laid before Him. All you want is to say something that is adequate to such an amazing God. I was there recently.
I work out of 2 journals: one that is writing and paragraphs of pouring out my mind and heart to God. Then there is another journal that's sort of "word art." I wish I could create beautiful art for Him. But He and I both know my words and His are a form of art, so that's where we join hands across the space of things unseen and we go together. When I don't know where to begin, but I sense a need to be with Him, I go to word art. I had a blank piece of paper in front of me, and the two words that seemed most appropriate with which to start were "You Are." Some of the things that poured out of "You Are" were answers to my needs and circumstances and heart longings. Knowing He is Author, Planner, Approver, Rest-giver, Coverer of my mouth, Creator of time, Peace, the One Who calls, Revealer, and more. In all of these words that were pouring out of my pen on this page, I felt scattered. My heart and my head were all over the place at the infinity of things that He Is. I wanted what would best praise Him and worship Him in that moment. I was hungry to really worship Him. I wanted to have the right words, the right heart, and I wanted Him to hear it. Really hear it, and have it radiate glory and all things true about that moment between us. I desired heaven to scream in joy and agreement when that praise rolled in. Not because of me, but because it was best about Him and we all knew it!
So in the midst of scribbling words, I became desperate to worship Him. Nothing I was writing was false or contrived, but it felt inadequate compared to the GOD in front of me. So, I told Him how desperate I felt to worship Him. His response surprised me. He said, "Then live."
Live.
I breathed in deeply, and Romans 12:1 flooded to my mind. The deepest way to worship, as God has defined it is to sacrifice. In light of Jesus' sacrifice in my place, what God calls mercy in that verse, I am to offer my life to God. If I want to worship, I need to live. But that doesn't imply that I go and do significant things right this moment. My initial reaction was to get up from my desk with a really powerful, significant checklist and do something great. Pen in hand I said, "God, tell me what to do today. Anything. What ever it is, I will do it!" Ears open, I was waiting for something great. God dug deeper in His response. "Living is not equated with doing, but being. Being here, even now, is living."
He brought to heart the story of Lazarus in John 11. You realize, Lazarus did not do anything spectacular but live at Christ's command. He's made famous in the Bible for living. Scratch that. Christ said He is made famous by giving life to a dead man named Lazarus. Lazarus living brought glory to God. (John 11:4, 40). When Jesus said to them, "Take off the grave clothes and let him go," He didn't tag on anything to that. It wasn't "let him go so he can preach." "Let him go so he can lead tons of people." "Let him go so he can make money to support good things." It was simply let him go so he can live. Living brings God glory.
Every moment, every breath He gives me, is a sign. It's a sign that God redeems, God has a purpose for a human, God has a plan for this woman, and God loves. Because I live, or exist, I point to a God that is glorious. He gives the life that is in me as a sign of His love and glory. One breath at a time. He is that LIFE (Jn 6:35, Deut 30:19-20). What else but His life could bring any glory at all? Everything else would fall short.
As I breathed in the depth of this truth and experience, God released this little list-making, box-checking, pen-in-hand woman by sharing that I could do nothing of earthly significance today but simply be, and being wrapped up in His life, that would be to His glory.
I sat being, as I do right now, asking Him to wrap me up in His life. With another breath breathed, Do with me what You want. In Your being and living in me, let it be real worship to You.
Just another seed of my faith,
Ginny
I work out of 2 journals: one that is writing and paragraphs of pouring out my mind and heart to God. Then there is another journal that's sort of "word art." I wish I could create beautiful art for Him. But He and I both know my words and His are a form of art, so that's where we join hands across the space of things unseen and we go together. When I don't know where to begin, but I sense a need to be with Him, I go to word art. I had a blank piece of paper in front of me, and the two words that seemed most appropriate with which to start were "You Are." Some of the things that poured out of "You Are" were answers to my needs and circumstances and heart longings. Knowing He is Author, Planner, Approver, Rest-giver, Coverer of my mouth, Creator of time, Peace, the One Who calls, Revealer, and more. In all of these words that were pouring out of my pen on this page, I felt scattered. My heart and my head were all over the place at the infinity of things that He Is. I wanted what would best praise Him and worship Him in that moment. I was hungry to really worship Him. I wanted to have the right words, the right heart, and I wanted Him to hear it. Really hear it, and have it radiate glory and all things true about that moment between us. I desired heaven to scream in joy and agreement when that praise rolled in. Not because of me, but because it was best about Him and we all knew it!
So in the midst of scribbling words, I became desperate to worship Him. Nothing I was writing was false or contrived, but it felt inadequate compared to the GOD in front of me. So, I told Him how desperate I felt to worship Him. His response surprised me. He said, "Then live."
Live.
I breathed in deeply, and Romans 12:1 flooded to my mind. The deepest way to worship, as God has defined it is to sacrifice. In light of Jesus' sacrifice in my place, what God calls mercy in that verse, I am to offer my life to God. If I want to worship, I need to live. But that doesn't imply that I go and do significant things right this moment. My initial reaction was to get up from my desk with a really powerful, significant checklist and do something great. Pen in hand I said, "God, tell me what to do today. Anything. What ever it is, I will do it!" Ears open, I was waiting for something great. God dug deeper in His response. "Living is not equated with doing, but being. Being here, even now, is living."
He brought to heart the story of Lazarus in John 11. You realize, Lazarus did not do anything spectacular but live at Christ's command. He's made famous in the Bible for living. Scratch that. Christ said He is made famous by giving life to a dead man named Lazarus. Lazarus living brought glory to God. (John 11:4, 40). When Jesus said to them, "Take off the grave clothes and let him go," He didn't tag on anything to that. It wasn't "let him go so he can preach." "Let him go so he can lead tons of people." "Let him go so he can make money to support good things." It was simply let him go so he can live. Living brings God glory.
Every moment, every breath He gives me, is a sign. It's a sign that God redeems, God has a purpose for a human, God has a plan for this woman, and God loves. Because I live, or exist, I point to a God that is glorious. He gives the life that is in me as a sign of His love and glory. One breath at a time. He is that LIFE (Jn 6:35, Deut 30:19-20). What else but His life could bring any glory at all? Everything else would fall short.
As I breathed in the depth of this truth and experience, God released this little list-making, box-checking, pen-in-hand woman by sharing that I could do nothing of earthly significance today but simply be, and being wrapped up in His life, that would be to His glory.
I sat being, as I do right now, asking Him to wrap me up in His life. With another breath breathed, Do with me what You want. In Your being and living in me, let it be real worship to You.
Just another seed of my faith,
Ginny
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
Greater Than >
My kids have started school, and we were back to math homework again. As a child, I think I was sick the day they introduced the principal of "greater than/less than." I still make the alligator mouths with my hands when I think about that concept. I struggled getting it right, and I still have to think about it sometimes, which way the > or < goes.
A few mornings ago I sat down to pray, and I got tired of my own voice. I had so much to bring before the Lord, and I was going down my list and feeling the weight of what I was carrying. Over this amount of emotion and simply life that I was holding before God, He stopped my mouth and in the God way that He does with me, stopped my words. God is so kind to me, He's never harsh, but I felt I very long, spiritual pause fall over me. In that I felt God asking me this, "I know your own voice is inadequate here. There is nothing more that you could say that would make this feel as though you had the power or life in you to change any of this. Gin (that's what He calls me), you have looked to yourself for all these things, and you can't bear it anymore. What are you going to do with this?" My ears were opened to the fact that all of my list seemed great. There were so many things I was breathing out and sorting out in front of Him, and the sum of that seemed even greater. The deepest part of me longed for power and life that would be able to take that list and all that was on me and in my hands, and take care of it. I was tired of my own voice offering the same struggles day after day, prayer after prayer. God showed me I needed something greater than.
I began to rattle off to Him my list, only this time seeking to see Who He Is on this side > of the equation of my life. God is greater than my pen (writing). I am simply a clay vessel that He uses for His glory and power. God is greater than my thoughts, His thoughts are higher. He is greater than my work, He owns the fields I work in and the horizon I look at. He is greater than my heart, for He knows all things. He is greater than my vision or even my sight; nothing can be hidden from Him. He is greater than my concerns. He tells me that He is a great God because He daily bears my burdens. He is greater than my fears. He has me right where He wants me. What can anyone do to me? He is greater than the authorities over me. He is enthroned above, and He is the One that put them there. He is greater than my future. He has it planned and promises it's good. He is greater than my heart needs. All my needs are met in the riches He has in Christ. My heart needs definitely are affordable to a generous God.
As He showed me He is greater, my voice and list faded, and His Voice spoke over me. Each one of those "greater than's" is found in His Word. His Word is power and brings life. In my case, God took a little mathematical sign and allowed it to point to His infinite greatness. He spoke over every concern, fear, issue, and even win, and brought glory to Himself. He showed me where He was powerful and what life would really be if I looked to Him for that. He not only met my list and shut my mouth, but He called my heart to worship a God that thankfully, is greater than me.
Just a seed of my faith,
Ginny
A few mornings ago I sat down to pray, and I got tired of my own voice. I had so much to bring before the Lord, and I was going down my list and feeling the weight of what I was carrying. Over this amount of emotion and simply life that I was holding before God, He stopped my mouth and in the God way that He does with me, stopped my words. God is so kind to me, He's never harsh, but I felt I very long, spiritual pause fall over me. In that I felt God asking me this, "I know your own voice is inadequate here. There is nothing more that you could say that would make this feel as though you had the power or life in you to change any of this. Gin (that's what He calls me), you have looked to yourself for all these things, and you can't bear it anymore. What are you going to do with this?" My ears were opened to the fact that all of my list seemed great. There were so many things I was breathing out and sorting out in front of Him, and the sum of that seemed even greater. The deepest part of me longed for power and life that would be able to take that list and all that was on me and in my hands, and take care of it. I was tired of my own voice offering the same struggles day after day, prayer after prayer. God showed me I needed something greater than.
I began to rattle off to Him my list, only this time seeking to see Who He Is on this side > of the equation of my life. God is greater than my pen (writing). I am simply a clay vessel that He uses for His glory and power. God is greater than my thoughts, His thoughts are higher. He is greater than my work, He owns the fields I work in and the horizon I look at. He is greater than my heart, for He knows all things. He is greater than my vision or even my sight; nothing can be hidden from Him. He is greater than my concerns. He tells me that He is a great God because He daily bears my burdens. He is greater than my fears. He has me right where He wants me. What can anyone do to me? He is greater than the authorities over me. He is enthroned above, and He is the One that put them there. He is greater than my future. He has it planned and promises it's good. He is greater than my heart needs. All my needs are met in the riches He has in Christ. My heart needs definitely are affordable to a generous God.
As He showed me He is greater, my voice and list faded, and His Voice spoke over me. Each one of those "greater than's" is found in His Word. His Word is power and brings life. In my case, God took a little mathematical sign and allowed it to point to His infinite greatness. He spoke over every concern, fear, issue, and even win, and brought glory to Himself. He showed me where He was powerful and what life would really be if I looked to Him for that. He not only met my list and shut my mouth, but He called my heart to worship a God that thankfully, is greater than me.
Just a seed of my faith,
Ginny
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