Well, I dropped my kids off at school. My little fourth grader had steely resolve in his jaw. Walking into a new classroom with a new teacher and only three kids he knows, well...we call that "doing hard things" at our house. I kissed him in my mind (Because there is no way he'd go for an actual kiss. That's ok, I get it.) and left him to some woman I met about 32 seconds before I exited the room. I hope I had steely resolve in my jaw too, because my heart was once again at the bottom of my stomach.
And let's not talk about the beautifully secure seventh grader who kissed me in the car and then waltzed into the building with freshly mascaraed eyes (it's a big year!) as she has the proverbial middle school bull by it's horns. She makes it look easy, but I drive away wondering where my summer and my little Lambie went. It seems like yesterday she was trembling at her kindergarten desk. My little guy too.
How did I get here?
I still feel every year like I am leaving my little lambs among wolves. God's called us to public school (another blog for another day) and so this is "doing hard things." Maybe this is you too. You have dropped your kids off on another first day of school and you back out of the room slowly with fake confidence so you both don't fall apart wondering what in the world you have done. Tears and pleas or "see ya mom!" are both hard. I don't want to play on your emotions or make you even more emotional than you are, so I'll just say we all can have strong feelings,
wonderings,
concerns,
and insecurities
on a day like today.
Can I give you a couple of truths that I rest on, no--cling to--on the first day of school?
God goes with them where I cannot.
God promises in both Old and New Testaments that He will never leave us or forsake us. The God of the universe Who loves my children perfectly and infinitely more than I do is with them, right this moment. He sees them, knows them, guides them and is over them in that classroom with that teacher and those kids. Praise God that He is more than me and more than enough, and He is with my kids.
Hear Him say: "'Never, never, never will I leave you; never, never will I forsake you.' So we say with confidence, 'The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?'" (Heb. 13:5-6)
Psalm 139 tells us God is intimately right there with us. He knows when we sit down, get up, think, go out, come home, words before we speak--He is familiar with all our ways. "You hem me in--behind and before; You have laid Your hand upon me." (v.5) There is nowhere we can go that He is not there. If those things are true for us, they are true for our kids. Bless You Jesus that Your hand is on them. Soak in that Psalm.
God knows they are lambs.
This truth and the verse that brings life to it are more precious to me than I will ever be able to express. Lamb is a word for little children that we have used for years. I think Chip's mom started it. Our daughter even had a Lambie, this little blanket with a lamb head that went with her everywhere. Lamb is precious in our home. And we have a saying in our world about being lambs or sheep among wolves. Those wolves can take the shape of everything from questionable preschoolers to bigger threats in our culture. I have already seen it used today on facebook in association with dropping little kindergartners off at school. Oh sister, I feel you! Did You know that phrase came from Jesus? He said He was sending His disciples--those precious to Him, the ones He loved, the ones that He was raising as He led them and taught them--as sheep or lambs among wolves. He knew the world was a hard place. He knows the world is a hard place. He knows how we feel!
If the truth is we are all doing hard things and Jesus knows they are hard things, if they are lambs among wolves and Jesus has said so and He has done the same thing with His own "kids," we are going to need some comfort.
Find our Good Shepherd with me in Isaiah 40. Hear Him say: "He tends His flock like a shepherd: He gathers the lambs in His arms and carries them close to His heart; He gently leads those that have young." (v. 11) Will you allow me to turn this into a prayer? My heart beats this verse and explaining it won't do when my own prayer is flowing even as I type it.
Thank you Jesus. You tend to us--that's not a contractual agreement for keeping us alive, but a personal, intimate, loving care and affection for us so that we are thriving. You protect us. You move us to places You desire us to go. That's being a shepherd. But You say more. You say You shepherd by gathering my children, my lambs into Your arms. But more, more than that, You carry them close to your heart. Praise You Jesus. They are precious to You too! And I can't thank You enough that not only do You treasure my lambs, but You gently lead me as a mother as well O, Shepherd, lead me gently through another first day. And a second day, and a third day. You have moved us to this place that You've desired us to go -- to school. I trust You by Your Word. How You love my kids and me. Thank You for Your promise and Your comfort.
So, cling to truth with me. Hanging on to a God Who never leaves or forsakes us or our kids, and trusting our Shepherd to carry our little lambs close to His heart, we may find that we all can have
strong feelings,
belief,
confidence,
hope,
and security
on a day like today.
Being led gently alongside you...
Just another seed of my faith,
Ginny
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